Embarrassing Admissions

Hello again! I'm sure everyone is curious about whether I actually got around to making that list from yesterday. Well, I did. I took myself out to lunch as a treat to a new (to me) Japanese cafe, and had a delicious bento box. I got out my pen and notebook and made a list of "10 Things I've Been Putting Off". I'm a bit embarrassed to share it, but over-sharing is caring, right? ;) The list is in no particular order, except for the order it came out of my brain, and my comments are in italics.

1) Sew a dress. or any other clothes, for that matter
2) Dress more Mori. a whimsical fashion with lots of dresses and layers.
3) Wear a costume. to a con: not cosplay, what I mean is a street fashion.
4) Try a new sport.
5) Go to a concert. deciding what to wear to the concert is the hard part!
6) Go shopping in Chinatown.
7) Do a short course. in a classroom setting, not online.
8) Post a photo of myself.
9) Go on a food tour. chocolate or cheese tour, something like that.
10) Go to a zine fair. There's one coming up next month!!

When I thought about it, I realised that I can physically do all of those things (except perhaps 4) Try a new sport, that depends on which sport I chose!) That's not what's holding me back. The excuses reasons holding me back from doing all of those include: "I'd feel too self-conscious", "people might laugh at me", "I'll have more fun if I wait til I'm thinner", "it won't look good on me", and "it won't fit anymore once I've lost weight".

All this is very frustrating and discouraging. How much of my life have I wasted? And how much of my energy worrying and stressing about it? But on the other hand, yesterday I went out to a new cafe, on my own. 6 months ago, I wouldn't have done that. A year ago I would have. 2 years ago, I wouldn't have. So I guess you could say: my path is very winding!

Now which of the things from my list am I going to do first??